Follow steps in order. Do not skip ahead. Do not consult the machine first.
Something real. With a plate. Preferably warm.
Granola bars retrieved from desk drawers do not qualify.
Horizontal. Eyes closed. Device in another room.
"Resting my eyes while scrolling" is not sleep.
Outside. Without a podcast. Notice things.
Trees have not been updated since the Cretaceous period. They are fine.
In person if possible. Voice if not. Text only as last resort.
Group chats do not count. You know which ones.
You will ask a better question now. The machine will notice.
If the problem persists after all five steps... the problem may not be the machine.
This card should be kept within reach at all times.
The Research Department cannot be held responsible for skipped steps.
theresearchdepartment.org · AMY SEHY · DIRECTOR OF FIELD STUDIES